Sunday, November 10, 2013

And we are done done done

It's official. The scale means nothing to me. We are done. I'm not going back. I'm not changing my mind. We are done. Forever.

I've known for a while that the scale was evil, I didn't totally buy it though. A piece of me needed to know the number. How much? How many pounds? Is it more, less, the same as yesterday?

I only weighed myself in the morning. No clothes. Before I drink anything. I've been known to step on the scale, hate what I saw, move the scale, step back on. Sigh. It was a horrible relationship. It could and would ruin my day. A stupid number from a stupid piece of junk. That dumb thing has made me cry countless times.

Once I started crossfit many people at the box told me "the scale doesn't matter". They talked all about "it's how you feel, how your clothes fit, and if you are seeing progress in the gym". Fran time faster? Great. Got a pull up? Awesome. Added 50 pounds to your clean? Badass. Still, I got on the scale from time to time. Not as often as I used to - but anything is better than everyday. Every.Day.

In January my box did a Paleo Challenge where they did a BMI test with an ultra sound machine. Super cool. Super awesome. There were measurements, ultra sound wand, and a scale (bastard). The machine took measurements from my waist, hip, and tricep  - did some sort of magic voodoo in the computer and spit out a number. My body fat % was 33.2. Yep. Fat. Duh, that's why I was starting crossfit AND doing a paleo challenge.

Well, guess what? I've worked hard, cleaned up my eating, and kept moving. Today I checked out the old body fat numbers. I've had a smile on my face all day - it was that great. 25.9. I can't say it with without smiling. I have thought about that number all day. 33 to 25. Fuck. Feels good. Craziest part? The scale reported 1 pound loss. WTF? My body fat went down that much and the scale is going to reward me 1 pound. I hate you.

That was my breaking point. The scale and I are done. What good is that number to me? No good. No good at all. The body fat % made me want to conquer the world, I'm pretty sure I stood taller, and naturally I can now lift everything better and faster. The scale just made me want to quit. Asshole.