Monday, September 28, 2015

Support - Knowing what you need and what you give

Synonyms: Encourage, boost, assist, promote

* To bear the weight of; keep from falling, sinking, or slipping

To keep from weakening or failing; give confidence or comfort to:
* To act in a secondary or subordinate role to (a leading performer).
* To offer help or advice

 The biggest job of a friend is to support. What does that really mean? It depends on the friend, it depends on the day, it depends on the can be really tough to figure out sometimes. 

Things have been pretty heavy over here lately, so I thought I'd write a meaningful post with some humor. Hopefully it reads to you as awesomely as it sounds in my brain. I have a lot of supporters in my life. I could not do it without them.....well I could, but it would not be nearly as comfortable. Comfort is a word that I need for support, if I am not comfortable with you I'm not going to accept or ask for much support. That's just how I roll. The comfort I need is much like a good sports bra.
* Feels like a warm hug. 
*Hard to get out of.  In a sticky situation that support is around  no matter what.
*Keeps me contained when shit gets real.
* Hides nothing - they are so honest. 
*Comes in a variety of styles.  
*The good ones can be hard to find and are irreplaceable

These will do the trick - which one are you?
I need strong people. I need listeners. I need people that will calm me down and help me see another perspective. I need people that can make me laugh at myself and situations. You know what else I need? I really need people that know sometimes I just need to spin.....sometimes I am just venting. I don't need you to solve my problems, I just need you to acknowledge that they suck and it will get better. 

I absolutely love the cute strappy sportsbras. They are like the friend that is fun to go out with, is hilarious on facebook, and serves their purpose as a fun friend. Sorry strappy bra, I'm not running to you when I need support.

Who is this supporting? No one, unless those straps are made out of steal cable
I have learned that to get good support you also have to give good support. My husband has spent years teaching me how to hug. Yes. Teaching. I didn't grow up with much in the way of hugging, just didn't really happen. Now I am complimented on my hugs and THAT feels good. Who doesn't love a good hug? Even my 8 year old knows that a one-armed hug is bad. Careful, he'll call you on it too. I have also learned to be a listener. It can be hard, but it's such a great skill to have. So many times people are just looking to say things out loud. They may not need a solution, they just need to hear it. So listen. Smile. Nod. Listen. 
Think about it. Figure out what you need. Be present and find your support strength. Are you a great listener? A great hugger? What do you need back? Do you have people that can give you that? 
Go out there and tackle this Monday!!!!!